Originally for December 11 – 11 Things. What are 11 things your life doesn’t need in 2011? How will you go about eliminating them? How will getting rid of these 11 things change your life? (Author: Sam Davidson)
These are my 11:
- Comfort eating/bingeing. Instead of working through my feelings, recognizing them, & then doing something proactive about it, I always turn to food. There are healthier ways of going about this. Like taking a walk, talking to someone, writing in my journal, watching a funny movie, creating, etc, versus stuffing my body full of packaged, unnatural, fatty foods. Which in the end only serves to make me feel worse. Both physically (bloat, stomach aches, headaches, fatigue) & mentally (guilt, shame, mood swings).
- Unrealistic expectations. On both myself & others. My impractical expectations only create suffering when they aren’t met. I want to change my expectations about what I & others should be doing and/or being, & practice allowing for reality & what is actually occurring. I need to replace my focus to what’s good & what is working.
- Not communicating what I need or want. I’m not the best at letting those in my life know how to support me or what I need. This goes along with #2. I have to become clear about what actually feels supportive or what it is I specifically need at a certain moment. If I expect someone to be able to read my mind, I’ve already set them up for failure & created unnecessary anger, sadness, or whatever other emotion, on my end.
- Road rage. This one is pretty self-explanatory.
- Shouldas, couldas, wouldas. Guilt, shame, worry, anxiety. Those emotions are no fun. Focus on the present & move on. Making mistakes is a part of life.
- Excuses. This goes along with everything I’ve listed above. I use fear, procrastination, perfectionism, emotions, etc., to explain away so many things. That is such a disservice to myself & to anyone I may involve.
- Negativity. I’m the queen of finding the wrong or negative in almost everything. Enough said right?
- Bad “friends.” I’m not talking about my own issues (see #2) but the people who, for whatever reasons, refuse to support you, be there when you ask, or recognize that there is reciprocity to any healthy, strong & happy relationships.
- Unnecessary or self-inflicted stress. I know that what I believe or think affects my well-being. So I need to keep my thoughts on the positive. And use my energy to create possibilities rather than creating what I fear.
- Crappy career. I’ve already covered this subject several times & most extensively here. Its time already.
- Mental & physical clutter. I have so many projects that I haven’t gotten around to, half-started & getting dusty; unlistened-to audios, unread articles and e-books, all saved on my laptop awaiting the “some day” pile; to-do lists a mile long; multiple books on the same subject because they all sounded better than the one I already owned; 20 pairs of cheap shoes that are the same style but a different color, a crazy huge collection of DVDs (half of which we’ve never watched & never will & some that are still in their original packaging). See the pattern here? These are the accumulations of boredom, emptiness, consumerism for the sake of it. My self-worth is not connected to objects.